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Last Five Entries
Veteran's Day and an Etiquette Question
2003-03-06 - 8:12 a.m.
A confession, among other things
I hav a confession to make. I am one of those persons who counts success by "stuff".
I realied this yesterday. It was our anniversary. We're trying to conserve on spending so we can last the next two weeks without having to resort to credit cards (he doesn't get his first paycheck until March. 22). We've been in money conservation mode since he got fired from the lawfirm.
I had a great party with friends for my birthday, but there wasn't a gift from my love. That hurt, but I understood. Yesterday was our anniversary, number 5; and not even a card.
I was so upset and depressed. I just expected to celebrate such a milestone in a special way, not just going home, eating dinner and doing the usual stuff.
Instead of being grateful for the fact that he has a job, and for what I have, I spend yesterday in a "funk" because of what I didn't have...a present. I should be ashamed of myself.
I get myself caught up in celebrating the what, but not the why.
"Stuff" isn't a measure of anything except the fact that we've got more of the stuff than someone else.
Instead of wanting 'stuff' I need to remember what's more important than stuff... love. I have the love of my true family and friends. I need to work on being happy and reasonably contant with the unseen gifts I get almost everyday. Not everything worth having is in a box surrounded by nice paper and a card.
Believe it or not, I haven't always been this way. I'm not sure when it changed or why, but it did. This has to change.
I am irritated with myself for behaving the way I did yesterday.
I spoke with Karin last night. She called because she had mistakenly heard that I was trying to set things up to sell Finnr's stuff. I explained what I was up to, and she was relieved and said she heartily approves. She is also going to loan me something that people can look at and say "that's Finnr" for people to look at and think about while they sit and read/write in the memory book (she thought the Memory Book was a great idea). She said that she was overwhelmed by the amount of help she's receiving, both monetarily and otherwise. It is all definitely needed. I told her about Win Cuan for a Day; and while it took her a minute to realize who Cuan is; she was flabbergasted that anyone would do such an incredible thing. I mentioned to her about the dunking booth at Pennsic and she thought that was really neat (whether it comes to fruition or not); she did mention that a few people are trying to talk her into going to Pennsic, but she's not sure yet. The main purpose of the phone call was to ask about what she'd heard and to let me know that she was ready to get back to work and Honey will see her on Monday (we'll be at work). She said she spoke to her brother in law and they both decided that it was time. She's a strong woman, a LOT stronger than I'd be, that's for sure.
We bought the yarn I need to work on my A&S project for coronation (yes, that's still in the works). The plan is to get started on the warping with the warping board tomorrow evenning; and perhaps warping the loom and starting the actual weaving on Saturday (before and after yard work... I've got some bulbs to plant!) Anyone wanna come help with either project? (Weaving or yard work)
Well, we're back at it again at work... so far in the past 24 hours, there have been at least two emails regarding what I'm supposed to be doing that were sent to the rest of my new team but not to me. One was about how I'm supposed to be moving my desk to one outside one of the senior analysts office. I didn't find this out until someone else came up and asked me how I think I'll like my new cube. I had no clue. Needless to say I'm a little "irked". I hate being left out of emails... it leaves me feeling a step behind. *sigh* I guess I need to step up the job search or get psychiatric counseling. I know it's an honest mistake, but it gets old when the same mistakes keep happening (you'll remember when I first came to my old team it took about three months to get me added to the email list. I had to resort to eavesdropping to find out anything.)
Something else.. you all might be glad to know that Spring is here... How do I know? I get a really horrid sinus headache when the seasons change.. and right now, I've got a killer one! Yick!
Please don't forget to answer my survey... it's research for a small business idea... all comments appreciated, no reasonable offer refused!!! It won't take five minutes, I PROMISE!
